My Interaction with Aspirants for NDA

 

Once Upon A Time in Ambala....

Sofarsounds@Pune!

Nehra's at RDC 2015

 

The Inspection

The Commanding Officer stood bravely alongside the brigade commander!

On the other side officers lined up, the horizontal or monkey rope being the object of interest, or rather, action! The regiment had successfully completed the 2 mile run. Major pumpkin pie sweated profusely, time and again trying to make eye contact with his CO.

One by one, the young subalterns and captains swung up easily, and crossed over. Of course my cigarette packet had to fall. The CO in his wisdom thought he should make me do the three times up down drill, thereby impressing the brigade commander with the little show of physical toughness. I had a rifle slung. Those days subalterns did Bpet with rifles and we were expected to run better than the men. Several years later, 20, to be more precise, I would be placed ninth in entire div HQ, run, but that is another story. 

Because the future had not yet arrived and pumpkin pie now was desperate to avoid the monkey rope test at all cost, having barely made it to pass the 2 mile run, a cycle here a cycle there strategic planning helped!

Having caught the CO's attention, pumpkin pie shrugged and rotated his arms, then made the most pained expression, gasping out aloud.

The CO took the cue, and bailed out pumpkin pie, informing the Cdr how the major was injured in games period, recently. All the while, I waited at the finish point of the rope, for the signal to come done, the CO having forgotten all about me!

The bright blue shorts of the Cdr fluttered in the breeze, his Dalmatian pet dog went around sniffing every tree. Having seen enough, he asked the CO to carry on the regiment test, all on his own. Giving one hard look at major pumpkin pie, he drove off, much to everyone’s delight. Pumpkin of course had to report to Brigade HQ to start working on the Cdr’s PhD thesis! He became good at this, even got himself one, and went on to command the regiment too. However, this one inspection was the last he attended.

He became wiser, took sick leave or casual leave just before every inspection and took pumpkin research seriously.

This story has a moral. In order to succeed, you don’t have to be good at everything always. All you have to do is be good at becoming a pumpkin!!!!

Hope you all enjoyed the short funny story.

- Jai

The Legend of Room No. 420

The year was 1995!

I was posted as G3 near Bikaner and was preparing for my Staff College Entrance Exam! This was my 2nd attempt, having missed out in my 1st attempt by a whisker!!

Since I was posted on Staff I could not be spared to attend the pre-staff course!

However, the BM, that time, Maj Pillai, from The GUARDS was kind enough to spare me from the morning and evening parade!

I was permitted to study at home and attend office from 8.30 to 1.30 only! He also offered to help me in my preparation for Tac B paper by checking my practice appreciations and guiding me!

Otherwise, I was struggling on my own to cope up with the syllabus for the exam and prepare for the big battle ahead of me.... Like a lone ranger!

Though, I did have the benefit of having the hand written notes, meticulously prepared by Kler Sir, which helped me a great deal in my struggle! Especially for SMT and Adm & Morale.... the entire syllabus reduced to two answer sheets each! So one did not have to read the entire study material for these two subjects again and again!

I remember having used to lock myself inside my study room for hours…... trying to study for the exam and adhere to time table that I had prepared for myself!!

Those days, my son Gaurav was about six months old and had just started crawling around the house! He would wait outside my study room for hours, piling up all his toys in front of the door as if planning an ambush! He used to wait for me to open the door and the moment I came out to take a break he would immediately rush inside the study and try and wreak havoc with my books and study material!! Shivani used to have a tough time controlling him!

Fortunately for me, the regt was at Jaisalmer those days and Rocky Thakur Sir was also preparing for the same exam! He was also lucky to have attended the pre-staff course at Secunderabad where Saby Sir was one of the Instructors!

That is when Col Das, who was the Comdt those days, asked me to come down to Jaisalmer. He said he will make me practice writing the appreciations for Tac B, check the same and give me some valuable tips and guidance in my preparation for the exam. In addition, I could also interact with Thakur Sir, go through the material from pre-staff and exchange notes with him!!

So, during my leave, I along with Shivani and Gaurav took the night bus from Bikaner to Jaisalmer and went to the Regt for a week!

And there I was.... practicing writing Tac B appreciations under the watchful eyes of Das Sir and also personally being mentored by him!

In the meanwhile, Mrs Sinha, who was staying in the Offrs Mess temp accn, used to look after Shivani and Gaurav! She also took them for the city darshan and for meeting with the other ladies staying in the offrs colony!

In addition to my studies, we also had some fun moments spent with our extended Gladiators family.... The married offrs were staying in the ONGC Complex on the other end of Jaisalmer! So, a few evenings were spent in calling on them and proved to be a big morale booster for me!

Thakur sir was staying in a rented house closer to the regt location!! So his house was our abode for the balance time available to us.... studying together, exchanging notes for each subject and trying to soak in as much knowledge as possible! Plus some fun moments for the ladies also!

That one week of my business cum pleasure trip to Jaisalmer proved to be very useful and raised my confidence level tremendously!

The nearest Exam Centre was Bathinda, but one could write the exam for any centre of his choice! So Thakur Sir and I decided to write the exam from Delhi Centre! We booked a guest room in ABHM at SP Marg, starting one week before the commencement of our exam so that we could do our final revision together and be ready for the battle ahead of us!!

I landed up in Delhi, at the ABHM, in last week of Aug, as planned. Thakur Sir was already staying at Mayur Vihar with his parents and he came down from there!

But to our horror ..... we found that we had been allotted Room No. 420!!! Our first reaction was .... "Gaye kaam se!!" We requested the Mess Havildar if he can shift us to some other room!! Obviously he expressed his inability to do so as all rooms were booked! So Room No. 420 was our abode for the next few days!!!

We began in the right earnest, trying to revise the syllabus of all subjects seriously and clear our last minute doubts as much as possible!

And then the day of reckoning arrived! Our first paper was GK & Current Affairs. While going through the newspaper to brush up on our current affairs, we read about the Ebola Virus, which had broken out in South Africa, in passing! Thakur Sir said that this seems to be a hot topic and we must read about it! And when we opened our Current Affairs paper in the exam hall.... there was a 50 marks question on Ebula Virus!! So it was like a blessing in disguise and boosted our morale and confidence tremendously!!!

Thereafter, one by one we went through the motions of studying and revising each subject and putting our knowledge and pearls of wisdom on paper during the exam! The notes prepared by Kler Sir for SMT and Adm & Morale turned out to be a savior for us for our revision!!

On the evening before the Tac B paper as we went to have our dinner in the mess, we found Go Sir, who was commanding WARDEC those days and staying in the temp accn in ABHM, waiting for us in the lobby! He had come to boost our morale and offered us a drink, which obviously we declined because we had to study for the most imp paper -  Tac B!

Go Sir told us, "Guys! Tac B is one subject which either you know it or don't! You will not be able to learn anything extra in 2-3 hours!” So we had a couple of Solan No. 1's on his behest before dinner to relax our mind a bit! Before leaving he wished us Best of Luck for the Tac B Paper!!

According to the grapevine, everyone was expecting the setting to be attack in mountains in the Tac B exam!!!

When I opened the Map for the Tac B paper in the exam hall, instead of mountains the setting was that of the deserts!! Two things struck me immediately.... Ghesura village and the Hanuman temple next to it which was the objective to be captured!!

Suddenly my confidence was boosted, because this was the exact location where I had done my first Sqn exercise as a troop leader under Bhatti Sir!

In that exercise, I was informed by none other than Thakur Sir, who was the adjt those days, that the sqn cdr has become a casualty and the then Comdt .... HC Sir has ordered me to lead the sqn for capture of our objective, Hanuman mandir near Ghesura Village!! Which the sqn did successfully and very valiantly!!

It seemed like Bajrang Bali was with me in my battle of Tac B paper that day and I came out of the exam hall after finishing the paper quite satisfied!!!

But alas, when we exchanged notes, my confidence went down a little bit because my plan was different from Thakur Sir's and I realised that I had also missed out on a few imp things!

But anyways, nothing could be done about it, other than keeping our fingers crossed and hoping for the best!!

We both returned to our respective locations, expecting that Room No. 420 will turn out to be lucky for us!!!

Finally, on 7th Nov 1995, while we were celebrating Gaurav's first birthday, we got to know that the Staff College entrance exam results have been declared! As luck would have it, both Thakur Sir and self had made it!!!

So, Room No. 420 had actually proved to be lucky for both of us!!!

A bit long!
Especially to be read by, those who are 'Look busy-do nothing' types and have faltu time like me!!

Our Friendly Neighborhood D.R.

By

A Gladiator

A DR is a DR , and we all know how true,

His job in the org, is routine and nothing new.
The story of this DR, as we gradually will learn,
Goes through many bumps, and a u-turn.
There once was a DQ, who the Commander liked.
In every cocktail party, his drink he spiked.
He trusted this DQ, with his very own life,
The DQ was a favorite, of the Commander's wife!
The DQ gave a letter to the DR one day.
“Give this letter to the CO of the unit, I say”,
The message was TOP SECRET, and known to very few,
But as it happened; the Commander's wife knew.
Charged with this mission, off the DR went,
Straight to the unit, to meet the Adjutant.
As luck would have it, he was stopped at the gate,
The RP stopped him short and told him to WAIT!
"CO Sahib's in office, and for lunch, about to go,
You can't see him now, you foolish so and so.
Meri naukri pukka jayegi, if you go in now,
Park behind the gate and wait there somehow."
"I have an urgent message, for CO Sahib I say,
It is TOP SECRET yaar; so let me go, I pray."
But the RP was a Naik; superseded one at that,
"Naheeeen; after CO leaves. Don't you get that?"
"Dont be in such a hurry; 'cause Adjutant will stay,
He only leaves office, when forced to go away.
So wait behind the gate, and let the CO pass,
Thereafter you can, deliver your this letter 'khaas'".
A seasoned chap, this DR, as usually DRs are,
He couldn't bear the insult, nor the 'inkaar'.
He turned about his bike an' fuming zoomed-off,
In all of his service, he had never been ticked-off.
Back to the DQ he did go, as fast as he could ride.
He told the DQ everything, an' nothing did he hide.
On hearing this, the DQ, like thunder began to shout,
He tried to ring the CO, but his telephone was 'out'.
So he told the Staff Captain, "The Unit is to blame”,
Tell the foolish Adjutant that, it is a bloody shame”.
The Staff Captain spoke, to the Adjutant at once,
He complained against the RP , and called him a ‘Dunce’.
The Adjutant was livid, with a voice loudly shrill,
He called in the RP and gave him extra drill.
No one stops a DR, for we all know by now,
He could well be carrying fodder, for the CO’s pet cow!
-----------
The poor DR was shocked, as any DR would be,
He neither smoked his beedi, nor had his cup of tea.
The DQ tried to calm him, and reassured him so,
But the soldier wouldn't hear of it! And ranted more 'n more.
“I won't go there again, I have just had enough,
This duty is a pain, and this job is too rough."
On hearing this, the DQ, loudly began to shout,
He ordered the Staff Captain, to kick the DR out.
The poor crestfallen DR, back to his unit went,
He reported to the RMO in the MI Room tent.
"My job", he told the Doc, "is becoming quite a bore,
Riding a bike all day, has made my bum quite sore."
The RMO, said 'Hmmm', as all RMOs do,
"Soldier, I hope this morn, did you go to the loo?"
His bum the Doc examined, and gave him ‘Attend C’,
“Take the week off my dear, then next week we'll see”.
Wthout a DR, Sir ji, all work came to a halt,
The Dak lay undelivered, for just an RP”s fault.
The matter was discussed in, Commander’s conference too,
No solution was found, after a tea-break or two.
Other MCs were there, but their mileage was all 'Nil',
The Jeeps were all NA, as they had taken many a spill.
They asked every unit, all ranks ran around,
Unfortunately for them all, a DR couldn't be found.
All other formations, a vehicle couldn't provide,
They were having CEME inspections, With no vehicles to ride.
They finally found a DR, attached to AWWA Shop,
But he was a big drunkard, who didn’t know when to stop!
"Without an MC/DR, what-the-hell can we do?"
Officers, JCOs and OR; no one had a clue?
When the CO heard about it, he called his Runner Jai,
“2IC Sahib ko bolo, Maine yaad kiya hai”.
-----------------
The LAMB, to the slaughter came, as he always did at noon,
His Commnand Report was due, and his Promotion Board was soon.
“Find a MC/DR, before the end of Day”,
The CO had barely finished, when the 2IC sped away,
Straight to the LION he went and passed the order on,
The LION to the JA, who passed it on and on.
The RP was called and he was questioned, why?
He narrated the incident, in a way that was wry.
At long last The LION, got up from his chair,
With notepad in hand, he entered TIGER's lair.
The 'Old Man' was 'mad', "COME IN", he did yell,
“What's wrong with this RP?,” his eyes began to swell.
“But Sir”, said the LION, "Our RP's not to blame,
The letter DR carried, did not have any name??
It was only a message, asking your lady wife,
To arrange a card session, for Commander’s wife!"
"I don't care a damn; he should let the DRs 'In',
Make sure its not repeated; now send the SM in?
The matter got reported up-the-command-chain,
The Div Staff heard about it, again and again.
Col Adm at Div HQ, he also came to know,
In all such cases, he never let it go.
He told his own AQ, "Put-up the case on file,”
Then he took it to GOC, his face bearing a smile?
The GOC that morning, was all shaven & shorn,
His wife had lost in cards, on that very morn,
His golf game was also, not quite at par,
The Col Adm too, had left the office door ajar.
So he pressed the panic button, called ADC in,
"Go an tell the Deputy, my wife must always win.
If she loses once again, his peace I'll surely take,
My wife must always win or his career is at stake."
He went upto his desk, and on a chair sat down,
He saw the DR's file, and developed a big frown,
“What the bloody hell is this? A DR can't be found?”
He ordered the Col Adm, to 'go look around'.
“I want a good DR, and I don't care how,
You beg, borrow, steal, or crank tail of a cow”.
Without an MC/DR, nothing can move, you know?",
So an EMERGENCY message was flashed to the CO.
-----------
The message for a DR, through the Signal Centre came,
It remained uncollected, as no DR ever came!
Then the Col Adm, to the CO he spoke,
And in a fit of rage, even called him a ‘Bloke’.
The CO knew at once, that his neck was in the noose,
If he didn’t find a DR, he would surely cook his goose.
He finally called his SM, and said, “Sahib, TAGDA RAHO”,
“Kal Subah tak, ek MC/DR paida karo”.
“Honcha Sir” said the SM, next morning, if you please,
There stood a MC/DR, all spit, polish and crease.
Messages were delivered, all documents were too,
Replies reached Commander, with the Dak of a day or two.
A cake was cut that evening,
Brought by the Mess Havildar,
It was bought from the baker,
By the new MC/DR!!
No one ever guessed, and no one ever will,
The OR couldn't ride a bike, nor he ever will.
But a DR from the unit, had finally been found,
'Total poora ho gayaa', there on the ground.
The BMs wife was happy,
The COs wife was too.
The Col Adm’s couldnt care less,
The GOC’s wife, she knew.
So in this quaint example,
There's a moral for us all.
That, in any such case,
'Total poora ho'...that's all!
***********************************************
It's just a jest. No offence meant!!!

-HC