The Inspection

The Commanding Officer stood bravely alongside the brigade commander!

On the other side officers lined up, the horizontal or monkey rope being the object of interest, or rather, action! The regiment had successfully completed the 2 mile run. Major pumpkin pie sweated profusely, time and again trying to make eye contact with his CO.

One by one, the young subalterns and captains swung up easily, and crossed over. Of course my cigarette packet had to fall. The CO in his wisdom thought he should make me do the three times up down drill, thereby impressing the brigade commander with the little show of physical toughness. I had a rifle slung. Those days subalterns did Bpet with rifles and we were expected to run better than the men. Several years later, 20, to be more precise, I would be placed ninth in entire div HQ, run, but that is another story. 

Because the future had not yet arrived and pumpkin pie now was desperate to avoid the monkey rope test at all cost, having barely made it to pass the 2 mile run, a cycle here a cycle there strategic planning helped!

Having caught the CO's attention, pumpkin pie shrugged and rotated his arms, then made the most pained expression, gasping out aloud.

The CO took the cue, and bailed out pumpkin pie, informing the Cdr how the major was injured in games period, recently. All the while, I waited at the finish point of the rope, for the signal to come done, the CO having forgotten all about me!

The bright blue shorts of the Cdr fluttered in the breeze, his Dalmatian pet dog went around sniffing every tree. Having seen enough, he asked the CO to carry on the regiment test, all on his own. Giving one hard look at major pumpkin pie, he drove off, much to everyone’s delight. Pumpkin of course had to report to Brigade HQ to start working on the Cdr’s PhD thesis! He became good at this, even got himself one, and went on to command the regiment too. However, this one inspection was the last he attended.

He became wiser, took sick leave or casual leave just before every inspection and took pumpkin research seriously.

This story has a moral. In order to succeed, you don’t have to be good at everything always. All you have to do is be good at becoming a pumpkin!!!!

Hope you all enjoyed the short funny story.

- Jai